Scales Are Meant for Baking or Selling Drugs

This isn’t a story about selling drugs. I wouldn’t even know where to start on that front. What this is, is my admission of letting go of my bathroom scale.

My mom never believed in scales when I was growing up. During my childhood, I was only weighed when I was at the doctor’s office for my yearly checkups. Don’t get me wrong, I understand the importance of knowing how much you weigh. It is necessary for health professionals when prescribing you antibiotics and giving you a baseline estimate about your general health and well-being.

The real problem with scales is that they can become part of your everyday story.

I know so many people who weigh themselves as soon as they wake up in the morning. This, obviously, because we all weigh the very least, we will weigh throughout the day first thing in the morning. Anyone with a loves/hate relationship with the bathroom scale knows that.

So in an effort to keep up with the Joneses or whatever the reason for our daily weigh-ins, we trudge over to the bathroom, eyes still blurred with sleep and step on that magical device that tells us our worth as human beings.

Up until about a year ago, I, too, was one of these people. If one of my morning weigh-ins revealed that I had gained several pounds from the week before, my entire day would be shot. I’d be frantic over what I was eating and go for an extra-long walk in hopes of burning off the added poundage.

It was as though something in that scale shackled me to the kind of person I hoped I’d be one day. I thought that if I could get down to my goal weight, I’d magically become the writer I’ve always dreamed of being. I’d know all the answers to the millions of parenting questions that plagued my brain on a day-to-day basis.

If I could achieve my goal weight, or better yet, achieve and then smash my goal weight to something smaller, something thinner, then I’d have a better marriage, I’d be funnier, people would generally like me more.

I know. That’s some fucked up shit right there, folks.

I don’t think I’m wrong in assuming that I’m not the only person that links their body type to their emotional and mental well-being.

When we talk about obesity, everyone loves to scream out their thoughts on how unhealthy it is to be overweight. They tell us fatties that we are walking, or rather, shuffling our way right into heart disease and diabetes. And yes, some of us are. Of course, keeping our bodies healthy and active is an important part of being human.

Go for walks. Eat fruits and veggies. Don’t chow down the entire family-sized bag of Ketchup chips.

It’s not that easy for some, I realize, and that’s why things like intermittent fasting and work-out videos from the 80s were invented. Sometimes we do have to work hard to get healthy, and that’s okay too.

But having a number on a scale value your life, and the type of person you are is just ludicrous.

Here are five alternative ways that you can give yourself value. Things that have nothing to do with the number you see on the scale each morning.

How often your friends reach out to you. I’ve really been throwing myself into work late because I’m trying to be more diligent and make a go of this working from the home thing (not easy). My amazing friends have reached out to me several times asking if everything is alright, mostly because I’ve been dodging their calls and not interacting on our group chat as much as usual. Then, once I explain that I’m crushing deadlines and writing my heart out, they tell me they understand and then tell me they love me. I think it is something really wonderful to have friends like that. It’s a thing that builds us into the people we are with the help from the people we love.
Your accomplishments checklist. It doesn’t even matter if you have all or any of your goals checked off of this checklist. The point is that you have one. Ambition and drive is not a terrible trait to have. It is important to have purpose in your life, and by looking into the future and driving towards specific goals, this feeds our self-worth in ways a number on the scale never could.
Being kind. I try to be a kind person. Sometimes I’m not, and that is a downfall I am working on. I remind myself to open doors for people and always be polite and friendly to service workers because, seriously, you guys, most people are just the worst to you if you’re behind a register.
Do dogs like you? Okay, I don’t have any concrete evidence for this one, but I really think that dogs, specifically my dog, are good judges of character. I think that when a doggo feels comfortable around you, you probably aren’t hiding any nefarious evil doings up in that old head of yours.
Speaking openly and honestly to the ones you love. This is something I’ve always struggled with because, at heart, I am a people pleaser. I find it incredibly difficult, to be honest with people because I worry I will hurt their feelings. However, being honest with your loved ones does show your worth as an individual because it means you’re allowing others in. It’s so easy to hold up within ourselves and get wrapped up in our own crap for eons and eons. Allowing others in and taking the time to reach out to those you love is what the human experience is all about.

About a year ago, I came out of the bathroom crying. My husband asked me what was wrong, and I wailed in a very unattractive way, “I’ve been working so hard on losing weight, and I haven’t lost a pound for two weeks. I suck at everything I try to do!”

He grabbed my shoulders, looked me in the eye and in a solemn tone, he replied, “Lind-Bae (his nickname for me) scales are only meant for baking and selling drugs. And I don’t see you doing either of those things right now. So put that stupid thing away and stop worrying so much. You are beautiful and smart and funny. That’s all that matters.

And thats what I did. I put the scale away and started focusing on more important things in my life.

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Previously Published on medium.com

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