Unaddressed anger can cause health problems. Research has linked chronic anger to anxiety and depression, headaches, high blood pressure, and heart disease, among other ailments. In this sense, getting help for an anger problem is an important self-care measure, one that can directly benefit mental and physical heath.
At the same time, though, many people don’t know how to get help or where to go for an anger problem. The short answer to this question is therapy, but how, more specifically, can therapy provide a unique space for healing from anger issues? What follow are some insights into this question.
A Safe Space for Sharing Emotions and What’s Underneath Them
Anger is considered a secondary emotion, which is externalized through rage, fighting, yelling, hitting, etc. Therapists can help provide a safe space for a person to become vulnerable enough to explore what’s underneath this emotion, which tends to be primary emotions of pain and/or fear.
People who have not grown up in safe environments where open expression of pain and fear is supported and resolved may try to defend and cover up these feelings through some form of anger, such as irritability, frustration, or negativity. These forms of anger provide a sense of safety—sometimes a false one—that they will be protected from getting hurt again or have their fears realized. Though the anger behaviors may protect them from getting hurt, they may be blocking positive outcomes of receiving love, support, or guidance.
Understanding Anger and Its Signals
Therapy can also help a person understand that anger is a normal human emotion that should not necessarily be suppressed, denied, or invalidated. Anger can be a signal for people to act and respond when they are facing real or potential physical or emotional danger. It can be an alarm that one’s personal rights are being violated or boundaries are being crossed.
Healthier Ways to Respond to and Communicate Anger
Sometimes, however, one hasn’t learned or practiced healthy ways to respond to their anger. They may become physically aggressive, verbally or emotionally abusive, or project blame onto others. A therapist can give honest feedback about how a person’s unhealthy anger behaviors, actions, and attitudes may be negatively affecting them and then provide corrective feedback when it is needed to improve communication skills.
Some people who have not been able to take the time to identify their emotions may also need to learn to expand their vocabulary of “feeling” words, so they can better articulate what they are feeling. Learning to use “I” statements, such as “I feel upset” or “I feel hurt,” can help an angry person go from blaming others, which can put others on the defensive, to owning up to their own feelings and taking responsibility for direct, open communication.
Identifying the Roots of Anger and Its Patterns in One’s Life
Therapists dig beneath the surface to not just address a specific, situational issue that is causing anger but to also help the client identify patterns in their anger responses and the sources of these patterns. Oftentimes, the source of anger comes from unresolved hurt from early childhood and family development, including abandonment, neglect, abuse, and betrayal, among other issues. When the sources of one’s anger patterns are discovered, it is easier to heal from these wounds and to adopt healthier ways of expressing hurt with the help and guidance of a therapist.
Anger Management Techniques
Therapists are educators in the sense that they can help teach helpful anger management techniques. One example: mindfulness exercises that help someone remain in their body rather than disassociate or disconnect from themselves. If you can become aware of your physical responses when you are getting angry, (heart racing, sweating, clenching muscles, flushed face, etc.), you can then practice different strategies to deescalate the situation rather than add fuel to it.
In all of these various ways, therapy can help to address, manage, and resolve anger issues that might otherwise be detrimental to health and quality of life.
—
Shutterstock
The post How Can Therapy Help an Anger Problem? appeared first on The Good Men Project.
Original Article
