“Pain is weakness leaving the body.” This quote was embedded into my DNA as a child, coming from my father who was a Marine. This passage stayed attached to me as I served in the Army. Even today, as I pushed through my workout, I invited that pain in because I knew it would benefit me in the end.
However, I no longer view physical pain as weakness. In fact, both the physical and mental aspects of pain aren’t weaknesses at all. When I look at my hands, calluses are formed. Yes, physically, they may look unappealing, but in reality, they are a blessing. They represent growth, an updated form of me. What exactly are calluses and what is their purpose?
Defined by the Oxford dictionary, calluses are a thickened and hardened part of the skin or soft tissue, especially in an area that has been subjected to friction. Calluses project a physical wound. A more direct response would be that the body, your body, is a protector and doesn’t want to suffer. Given two options, both physically and neurologically, the body will let you know that your current being is feeling discomfort, possibly some pain. You can either stop this feeling by not allowing it to continue, or you can proceed to move forward and see what the outcome is at the end.
To some, feeling uncomfortable, enduring the pain can and is unbearable. To that, you choose to stop, and the pain goes away. At times, we can stop the physical pain and no calluses are formed. But what about the mental and emotional side of pain that we endure in our lives. Are we capable of creating calluses for our mind? The answer is tricky, and it is based on the will of the individual that is enduring this emotional pain. Some are capable of pushing through grief, struggle, and mental pain with some form of ease. Others, like me, can mentally power down and go dark. Again, the body doesn’t want to die, so the mind can redirect these uncomfortable feelings and choose a different path for you. In my case, I chose avoidance, towards family and friends. Unknowingly, I became a different person, escalating to numbness. At the end of this dark tunnel, it led me to a mental facility for eleven months. The emotional calluses were protecting me, but they became too hardened and became a burden attempting to be removed.
Seeking professional help through cognitive behavioral therapy, (CBT), my therapist assisted in removing the emotional calluses I had. And with this, I became more tuned, dialed in to my feelings; I was able to breathe and mentally grow. This is similar to the physical growth of hard skin wanting to produce a better you. The physical pain that I allow myself to feel, I no longer see as weakness leaving my body. It is growth being developed for me. The same for my mental push; accepting any and all feelings allows me to grow into a better and stronger person.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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The post Concede to Your Calluses to Create a Better You appeared first on The Good Men Project.
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