Grieving Losses

Grief…dealing with heartbreak and loss. Most of us have grieved the loss of a loved one… a pet loss, a friend, a parent, or a romantic relationship. The process doesn’t have a timeline, and all five stages are not linear, yet they are all intertwined. It’s a big bucket of emotions… grief, sadness, anger, guilt, anxiety, confusion, frustration, fear, resentment, yearning, envy, etc. It’s a lot of emotions to sort out, and it all stems from loss. In this episode, Joe covers his own journey that has reached the latter part of this process. Dealing with the recent ending of a year-long romance, Joe painfully shares how the pain process stems from the grief he feels and how he has learned to identify the series of emotions he is experiencing and how you can reconcile those same stages to help you deal with these same emotions.

In this Episode:

Opening yourself up, allowing yourself to be vulnerable, and giving away some of your power
The George Costanza “do the opposite of your initial thoughts” paradox
Not letting your desires outweigh logic
Surviving being “Open and Vulnerable” and the strength you gain
Dealing with the multiple stages of Grief and when you will know you have reached the last
stage

This episode builds off the last episode, Cut and Burn. The aftermath of staying in a relationship longer in order to grow from the experience is the conundrum. Part of the grieving process is to get to the point where you accept your role, you accept how you showed up, you accept the humiliation, and you accept all of the good and all the bad. But when we’re in our grief and a breakup, all we can see is the hurt and the negative. If we don’t get into our vulnerability, and we keep repeating the same patterns that we always repeat, and we cut and burn at the same point, we will never grow. We are never going to become stronger. We will never be able to work on dousing those fears and getting comfortable with being who we are.

Joe Ryan has been on a lifelong journey of overcoming trauma, shame, and the demons that plague him from his childhood. He has turned his mission outward, helping other people to conquer their traumatic pasts. Through his podcast ‘It’s Not You; It’s Your Trauma’ and one on one coaching.

Joe is paving the way for people to heal. He is baring his soul publicly to extend a hand to people who might feel stuck or frozen in their healing journeys. There are coaches out there who strive to do the same, but what sets Joe apart is that his voice embodies such compassion and warmth; when you hear it, it permits you to feel whatever you need to feel to progress on your emotional journey.

Father of two…

I take pictures, write, and obsess.
You can find me bouncing around New York City or by a lakeside fire. I was on a Pearl Jam kick, now starting my day with The Revivalists

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Previously Published on joeryan.com

It’s Not You, It’s Your Trauma Podcast- Trauma, PTSD, Abuse, Anxiety & Recovery – with Joe Ryan

Real, genuine, vulnerable, and honest talk. There are no quick fixes from trauma, abuse, addiction, PSTD, or anxiety. Knowing what happened to you is only part of the process, we have to relive the feelings, emotions, and scenes we avoid. When we stop blaming, making excuses and take responsibility for our own emotions, that’s the start of moving from victim to surviving, from surviving to survivor and finally to thriving and teaching.

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