Author: Sarah ReganApril 25, 2023mbg Spirituality & Relationships EditorBy Sarah Reganmbg Spirituality & Relationships EditorSarah Regan is a Spirituality & Relationships Editor, and a registered yoga instructor. She received her bachelor's in broadcasting and mass communication from SUNY Oswego, and lives in Buffalo, New York.The toxic person testWhat is a toxic person?Signs of a toxic personAm I toxic?How to stop being toxicFAQImage by Kinga Cichewicz / UnsplashApril 25, 2023Our editors have independently chosen the products listed on this page. If you purchase something mentioned in this article, we may earn a small commission.All of us have the capacity to exhibit a toxic trait or two once in a while—but how can you know if you're actually a toxic person? Here, we explain what it means to be a toxic person, plus a quick quiz to test if you might be one yourself.
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This ad is displayed using third party content and we do not control its accessibility features.The toxic person test
This short, 16-question toxic person test checks for a number of common toxic traits. Be honest and take your time reflecting on each of the questions, and don't be afraid of a "bad" result. Should you discover you're exhibiting toxic traits, we'll go over what to do about that later on in this article.
The Toxic Person Test
You're showing signs of toxic traits.
Based on your responses, you're showing a high degree of toxic traits such as avoiding accountability, lacking empathy, selfishness, and manipulating others. If you've had a hard time sustaining relationships, this might be why—but with honest reflection and growth, you can unlearn your more toxic behaviors.
You may exhibit some toxic traits
Based on your responses, you seem to exhibit some toxic traits, but not enough to make you a full blown toxic person. Nevertheless, it's never too late to reflect on your behaviors and make adjustments to grow into a better version of yourself.
Doesn't seem like you're particularly toxic.
Based on your responses, you aren't exhibiting common toxic traits like manipulation or a lack of empathy. Keep doing what you're doing!
Do you openly judge or criticize others?
Do you manipulate others to get your way?
How do you handle conflict?
Do you throw pity parties for yourself?
Do you ever lie?
How do you handle someone being upset with you?
When was the last time you yelled at someone?
How do you comfort other people?
Do you empathize with other people?
Are you dogmatic?
Your friend says they're not feeling up for your plans—how do you react?
What motivates your friendships and relationships?
Do you think you're better than most people?
Do you have difficulty with serious conversations?
Do you have a hard time sustaining relationships?
Last question—do you think you're toxic?
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This ad is displayed using third party content and we do not control its accessibility features.What is a toxic person?
Toxic people are people who cause harm to others in a consistent and ongoing way, whether consciously or unconsciously.
As licensed psychotherapist Babita Spinelli, L.P., J.D., previously told mindbodygreen, these people can have a negative impact on others through their behavior, whether they're attempting to manipulate someone, control them, or abuse them in any way.
Some people can have toxic traits without necessarily realizing the effect they're having on other people, or being an overall toxic person, while others knowingly engage in toxic behaviors.
According to clinical psychologist Perpetua Neo, DClinPsy, the latter is especially common among dark personality types (your psychopaths, narcissists, Machiavellians, etc.), which are often correlated with toxic traits. "Then there's another added layer where there are those who do it sadistically to cause drama or watch someone squirm," she tells mbg.
Signs of a toxic person
- Being judgmental
- Control issues
- Lack of empathy
- Disrespecting boundaries
- Lying
- Manipulation (i.e., gaslighting, guilt-tripping, etc.)
- Toxic positivity
- Being a fair-weather friend
- Inability to have serious conversations (i.e., making a joke out of everything)
- Being overly competitive
- Being overly dogmatic
- Treating everyone like a problem that needs fixing
- Codependency
- Lack of accountability
- Playing the victim
- Being unsupportive or sabotaging
- Bullying
- Physical, emotional, or verbal abuse
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This ad is displayed using third party content and we do not control its accessibility features.Am I toxic?
If you have a nagging feeling you might be the toxic one in your life, know that it's absolutely possible to address it and change your behavior. But first, you have to determine if you're truly being toxic.
Looking at the quiz and list of toxic traits above, honestly reflect on how often you exhibit these more negative, "toxic" qualities. Ask yourself why certain relationships have gone awry in your life, and whether their downfall had to do with your behavior. According to Neo, it's even worthwhile to ask friends, family members, or past partners whether they've found any of your behavior in the past to be toxic.
Cultivating mindfulness toward your thoughts and actions will slowly but surely start to reveal things like emotional triggers, stress, or control issues that may manifest into toxic behaviors. And once you start noticing them, you'll be better equipped to change the patterns.
How to stop being toxic
Just because you exhibit toxic behaviors does not make you an entirely toxic person (though we can't rule that out—only you can). The good news, according to Neo, is "with a little self-reflection and asking for feedback from others, we can become aware of these habits and eradicate them so we can become better people."
Be sure to look into our guide to changing toxic behavior in yourself, as well as our breakdown on how to spot and fix your own red flags.
Start by simply noticing your thoughts and behaviors to catch when your more toxic tendencies start to rear their heads. Allow yourself grace and acknowledge that you're trying to be a better person, and don't be afraid to lean on support from mental health professionals or your support system.
The more you check your own behavior, the more you can change it.
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This ad is displayed using third party content and we do not control its accessibility features.The takeaway
We're often quick to claim others in our lives are toxic, without ever questioning our own toxic traits. If you've realized you may have a toxic streak, that doesn't mean you can't change for the better—and the fact that you made it this far suggests you care (at least a bit) about not being a toxic force in your own life.
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This ad is displayed using third party content and we do not control its accessibility features.Sarah Reganmbg Spirituality & Relationships EditorSarah Regan is a Spirituality & Relationships Editor, a registered yoga instructor, and an avid astrologer and tarot reader. She received her bachelor's in broadcasting and mass communication from State University of New York at Oswego, and lives in Buffalo, New York.
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